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Monday, July 8, 2013
Sunday, June 16, 2013
Leadership Lessons from my father
Abba(Dad) and Ema(Mom) |
Fatherhood
is the highest calling of leadership. Good fathers are good leaders. How do I
know? I am lucky and blessed to have someone like that in my life.
Abba as we
call him, (Father in Hebrew) is an extraordinary person I look up to and have
made a positive impact in my whole life.
Abba is one of the most important
people in my life that I value and continue to thank God who blessed me with
being his son.
Abba taught
me several leadership lessons throughout out his life and continues to do so as
a great father/leader to his family.
Here are
some of the lessons I always reflect on his greatness and gifts:
Life and Family is about giving
Abba has
taught me the most important quality of being a leader. A good father/leader
has a servant heart that comes from serving people and help them succeed-wanting
the best for others. Abba is a selfless leader that really would do whatever it
takes to give all he has so that we would be the best we can be in life. He has
an attitude that says: “How can I serve my family and my children in
their best interests?”
Open Mind and Open Heart
Abba taught and
continues to teach we need to stay open to possibilities and listen intently to
what’s in our heart. Where do we make a positive difference in the lives of
other people besides ourselves? Do we take care of other people by staying open
with their challenges and continue to give open-hearted support throughout challenging
times.
Continue to seek feedback and learn
from it
Abba has
taught me another critical leadership lesson that we should never forget as we
develop our potential-Being open to receiving feedback and learning from it makes
you a better, stronger person in life. Abba taught me we can only improve if we
take time to reflect as everything in our life is a teacher.
Everything
we encounter is a moment of teaching to learn about who we are and what we can
become. But if we dismiss people and their feedback, we are not learning. My
life has changed because of the attitude Abba shared with me to take in
reflection of the learning journey as we need to respect other people thoughts
and feelings.
Never give up on anybody in your
family
Abba gave me
another great example on how to accept people in our family with unconditional
love and kindness. This is a spiritual leadership quality that is Godsend.
all families face
challenges and opportunities as no one gave us instructions on how to deal
with. But God gave my parents the biggest unconditional loving heart that
conquers all the difficulties and moments of learning in our family.
That’s
what leadership is about-love and caring unconditionally the people that
mean the most in your life. The day you become a leader is the day you are
willing to sacrifice your ego for someone’s heart.
Thank you
Abba for the lessons in life and hoping to learn more from you for more and
more years to come. I love you always forever. God bless you.
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
The three A’s of Leadership-The keys that open us
Leadership
is experienced differently by each of us. But leadership is always expressed in
relational terms as we begin to widen the circle of leadership around us for
future generations.
We begin to build those leadership relationships by working
on adding positive values as we engage to learn more about each other’s unique contributions. As leaders,
each one of us brings an exceptional set of values to enhance our dialogue and meaningful
leadership discussions.
Relational
thinking is the spiritual discipline through which we begin to see ourselves in
relations to others, as part of the whole, not apart from it. Relational
Leadership requires us simultaneously to observe the three A’s of leadership. The
three A’s are not extras. They are important characteristics of relational
leadership:
The Three A's of Leadership are:
Attunement
Attunement is
mirrored through attentiveness from one person to another. Attentiveness means thoughtfulness
by noticing and hearing the words, spirits, and experiences of other people. As
we experience authentic attention-we truly feel who we are on a deeper level
and understand what others trying to communicate and feel.
It’s our way of
validating the feedback and thoughts of others through empathic leadership. When we stay
attuned, it creates a zone of trust and safety around us. We feel encouraged to
look for instead of waiting for someone to create trust. We let others feel
safe in our leadership environment that we constantly trying to build as an environment
of trust.
Acceptance
Acceptance
in relational leadership is determined by unconditional caring. In acceptance,
we are embracing people as worthy, empowered, understood and fully approved of
who they are as unique individuals. We give kind support for other people’s
path no matter how you view the situation at that moment.
Acceptance is another component of creating
the trust zone in our relations. We hold and suspend our judgments toward other
people in order to help them feel safer in our environments. We want to help
people feel more of what they are, so that they can realize their true
potential without destructive feedback that only demoralizes a person.
Appreciation
Appreciation
elevates acceptance with gratitude. In appreciation, we communicate with
admiration the qualities in each other without any reward. The reward is the
joy of the energy that comes from your open heart. Appreciation includes
gratitude of kindness and a gift we give to others out of no motive but a sense
of appreciating our relationships.
When we appreciate, we have the ability to
extend ourselves and become better leaders and better people. Appreciation gets so under-utilized in our culture
because we tend to focus on what’s not working instead of what’s working right
and how we can uplift the “right” toward an empowering vision for the future.
What other
values you want to share as part of the dialogue on relational leadership?
Looking forward to learning from you.
Friday, June 7, 2013
Are you creating an authentic dialogue?
One of the
essentials of authentic leadership is the power of authentic dialogue.
Authentic
dialogue begin to happens when the leader value the web of relationships in any
environment.
Authentic leaders thrive on opportunities to connect in a meaningful
conversation to foster a greater collaboration and diverse perspectives within
their teams. The authentic leader has a sincere open mind to the wide
range of generational views presented to them on a daily basis.
Working
collaboratively always brings better results than working competitively. When people
don’t work together to share results, the organization becomes more about
self-interest which can potentially derail moral and performance in the long
run.
Authentic
leaders who have the courage to invite authentic dialogue are more effective.
Of course, disagreements and conflicts are unavoidable in the process. But when
you insist on a professional environment that reward and recognizes different
point of views, everybody wins.
How can we use the power of authentic
dialogue at work and in our personal lives?
"Dialogue and
education for peace can help free our hearts from the impulse toward
intolerance and the rejection of others." Daisaku
Ikeda
Focus on what matters
As a leader
it’s important to keep your team focused on what really matters. Are you
engaging the conversations that invite insightful ideas to make things better?
Are those conversations going anywhere or just chit chat? Intention is the key
in this stage. You have to ask yourself, what is our intention and mission of our dialogue.
In other words, “what are we trying to achieve together?”
Speak your heart and mind
When engaging
in authentic dialogue, you need to have a servant heart. Authentic leaders must
communicate in a genuine way that speaks from their heart. It’s about asking “how may I
serve the people I am with”? This is where integrity comes into to
play. You need to encourage honesty and real feedback from everyone. As you
speak and communicate candidly, everyone will appreciate the source of your
thoughts as they come from an authentic place of your heart and soul.
Listen together for insights and
deeper questions
Another aspect
of authentic dialogue that sometimes gets underestimated is the connection on a
deeper level for understanding and reflection. As leaders we have to encourage
an open dialogue that embraces a learning mindset for everyone. It
means listening intently to other perspectives and reflecting deeply on
everyone contribution. The question every leader should ask here is-“What
am I going to learn today?” Let me sit back and ponder on what I am hearing
today.”
Link and connect ideas
Last and not
least is our ability as authentic leaders to connect the dots of ideas and
create an environment where everyone point of view is part of the whole. We
are a team of ideas. One person’s idea is never enough to take us to a
higher level of collaboration and success. By connecting everyone’s idea, we take
a further step toward collective leadership. It takes courage and humility to
honor everyone's point of view because the power of authentic dialogue starts and
ends when you respect others as human beings.
"In true
dialogue, both sides are willing to change."ThÃch Nhat Hanh
Thursday, May 30, 2013
The best of Lead With Giants-Uplifting Leadership Insights!
This month’s
Best of Lead With Giants is being hosted by Dan Forbes on his blog http://www.leadwithgiants.com/ .
Jump on over there now to see the best leadership blog posts published
this month from the Lead With Giants Community.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Are you communicating or connecting with others?
With the
increase use of social media such as Twitter, Facebook and blogs, we are
bombarded with thousands of messages every single day.
Our world is cluttered
with words all day long as we receive and send messages to the people around
us.
We seem to communicate more than any other time in history by the resources available to us.
But are we communicating or connecting?
When we
connect with other people, we not only feel more human, we are able to do
greater things than we could have done alone. We move beyond the isolation of
office cubicles and gated communities to unite with others on many levels. The
days when we could do our own thing and it was ok are long gone. Even simple
mechanical procedures require connection to be effective.
Great communication
and leadership are all about connecting. Your ability to communicate and
connect with others is a crucial factor in reaching your leadership potential.
To be a successful leader, you must work with others. And to do that, you must
do more than just communicate—you must connect.
As
leadership expert John C. Maxwell says, “Everyone communicates but few
connect.” Connecting is everything when it comes to meaningful relationships.
Connection
is part of the human condition we cannot ignore. We were born to connect and interrelate
with other people on a higher level. When we meet new people, we seek to
connect with them and try to find something in common with the other person by
sharing our stories to learn more about each other.
Connection increases trust
When we
connect, we build trust, and when we build trust, we are able to be open to new
possibilities. When connection increases, trust increases. Connecting people to
each other is the foundation for team synergy. Without connections, teams don’t
exist. The more I get to know about you, the more I can trust you.
When I trust
you, I am more willing to work with you and take risks. As we work together we
learn more about our strengths and weaknesses. In the process of working
together, I learn that you are reliable and that I can count on you for
support, then trust increases further and our relationship deepens.
Connection helps relationships
Connection
is the key to any successful relationship. If you can connect with others at every
opportunity whether it is one-on-one or in groups, your relationships will be
much stronger. Your ability to create
teamwork increases as you increase your leadership positive connection with
others.
Relationships
are more trustworthy and open when there is a connection there. The small
connections every day can be very meaningful and insightful as we grow and
mature in our relations to each other.
Connecting leads to better understanding
because when you connect, you listen attentively and care for the other person’s
story as it was your own.
Connection helps your growth as a
leader
Connecting
is vital for any person who wants to achieve personal growth. It is essential
for anyone who wants to continue building and sustain great relationships. You
will only be able to reach your leadership potential when you really learn to
make the effort to connect with other people.
If you are going to connect and
grow as a leader, you need to understand yourself and others better. Great
leaders focus on other people needs and aspirations. When people know you care
about them and understand them, it makes a lasting connection.
Before you
can communicate with anybody, you need to care for them and empathize with
them. Connection helps make that leap from being a good communication to a
great one.
How do you connect with others?
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Become the Kind of Person Others Want to Follow
“The key to becoming an
effective leader is not to focus on making other people follow, but on making
yourself the kind of person they want to follow. “ Lee Cockerell
Leadership is
an expression of your heart and soul. To become a leader, you need to know your
higher purpose and believe in it passionately.You can
develop the qualities of authenticity, empathy, curiosity, developing others
and explaining the big WHY.
As a leader you need to be fully committed to
nurturing the well-being and commanding the trust of the people around you.
Only in the
context of a meaningful relationship can people feel empowered and inspired to
demonstrate their greatest potential.
Finding your authentic self
Leaders need
to feel comfortable in their own skin. It begins with the ability to explore
and share one’s life story by helping people understand how we all mesh
together for a meaningful journey. You intentionally begin to discover your
authentic self by connecting with who you really are. Authentic leaders are not
power driven but meaning driven people.
They want to
explore why they are here on this earth. They want to connect to their heart
and understand how to elevate their soul to help other become the best they can
be. Vulnerability
and humility are trademarks of the authentic leader and create a positive, beautiful
energy. Customers and employees want to help an authentic person to succeed.
Why empathy is more important than
ever?
A leader who
has walked a mile in their follower’s shoes is more likely to inspire loyal
followers.
Leaders need
to find a genuine balance between the ability to share their own stories and take
the time to listen to the stories of others. Leaders need to understand the
people around them and how to uplift the human connection. A great way to do
that is by practicing empathy.
Empathy
takes a lot of emotional effort because it’s not in our nature to live another
person’s story. We really have to strip away from our own personal thoughts,
assumptions and evaluations of the people around us. We have to really listen
hard as though we are experiencing their pain.
Good leaders
take the time to listen to, and connect with followers at all levels. They
demonstrate they understand and empathize with followers' concerns, values,
priorities, and aspirations.
Developing others will be a priority
Leaders are
also investing in one of the most significant facets of leadership today-teaching.
Teaching can be very rewarding experience as we continue to develop the
capacities in others. With teaching, we are taking people to a mentoring
journey that hones people’s potential.
When we
teach, we make a difference with our hearts and minds. We are interested in
other people’s growth and capacities. We have to be committed to nurturing and
planting more seeds for the next generation of leaders.
Leadership
legacy involves bringing out the best in your followers. We need to create an
organizational culture in which the strengths and potential of each individual
are valued and recognized.
Explaining the big WHY
Leaders need
to develop the big WHY As the days of command and control are over, the vision
and direction of a team would be about the ability of the leader to capture the
big WHY in the hearts and minds of others. People rally behind a strong vision
when they know WHY they doing what they doing.
Explaining
the big WHY also creates a dynamic accountability within the organization. When
people understand how their roles tie into the big vision, the more of a
difference they can make on a daily basis. But when people fall short of that
difference, we have a compelling WHY to help them understand and hold them
accountable.
Developing curiosity
Leaders will
need to develop a sense of on-going curiosity to help them bridge the gap
between today and tomorrow ever- changing work force and innovation. Leaders
need have to embrace the unknown by being curious as global changes happen
rapidly almost every day.
As more and
more people join from different cultures and backgrounds, the leader would have
to connect and discover new ways to establish new connections and create a
harmonious organization.
Leadership
will require exploring and discovering new ways of leading and serving as a
whole and not only within a local community. People have found ways to
communicate and build communities of practice throughout the world by being
curious.
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